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Officer Dick Downey's Pot Report

My 10-20

Your Illinois Medical Cannabis Authority

product packaging. A four inch high black plastic pill bottle with a twist off top and a purple label.

Case: Platinum Girl Scout Cookies (flower)  

 

File Date: 05/24/2016


Case No: 0006

product photo. An eye level shot of several popcorn sized sage and light-green colored buds with loads of orange hairs and a decent coating of trichomes.

NARRATION:
“On my honor I will do my best to do my duty to God and my country and to obey the Scout Law; to help other people at all times; to keep myself physically strong, mentally awake, and morally straight.”

Believe it or not, there was a time when Officer Downey was a lost, weak soul. He was a gutless nothing 7 year old without a clue. And then these words, this sacred oath, changed everything. The Cub Scouts tore me down and the Boy Scouts built me up to be the Eagle Scout and officer of the law that I am today.

Now, you commie-socialist dopers can go ahead and mock America and everything that makes it great all the live long day. You want to thumb your noses at the law? Fine. This is America; you have that constitutional right. You can even smoke your so called “meds” in my city until your pea-brains explode. But there are a few stark lines in Officer Downey’s world that you burnouts can never cross, and you just crossed one.

You had the cojones to name one of your devil vines after a scouting program so allow me to illuminate the terrain in which we currently find ourselves. What I have are a very particular set of skills, skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you change the name of your devil’s vine, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will force feed you 1,000 boxes of Girl Scout cookies.

 
ANALYSIS:
Type: Indica-Dominant Hybrid (Typically, 60%/40% ratio)

Genotype:  
Platinum GSC  =  Durban Poison  X  OG Kush  X  Unknown Third Strain

Some have speculated that ‘Platinum OG’, a strong variety of OG Kush, might be the mysterious 3rd strain. 

Purchase Date: 5/17/2016

Cultivator:
Green Thumb Industries (GTI)

Delivery Method Used: Clean glass pipe


Cannabinoids Profile: THCa 24.4%; THC 0%; CBDa 0%; CBD 0% (ACT Labs)


TIP: To learn how you can use this cannabinoids data to better your health, see the Cannabinoids Library page. 

Phenotype Profile: This sample expressed just about all of the characteristics for this strain - sage and light-green in color with loads of orange hairs and coated in trichomes. Sometimes a GTI batch will exhibit some purple tinge, though this sample did not. This characteristic is sometimes expressed. The buds were dense and, in this case, small popcorn-sized and smaller.

         Bud Density: 4     [1-5]

Terpene Profile: In its intact bud form, it has a pungent-pine odor with earthy and sweet notes. It’s dank. Once ground, the earth-pine pungency of the Kush is front and center. This sample of PGSC tasted sweet and hashy, with a pungent & light pine finish that lingers.


TIP: To learn all about terpenes, see the Terpenes Library page. 

Effects: The expected effects were expressed - a powerful, balanced, mind-body experience with a noticeable leaning toward the Indica. However, the cerebral element was quite intense at times. This strain also had a mild but noticeable ‘creeper’ element to it.

Duration of Effects: 2+ hours

May Help With: overall body pain, muscle spasms, nerve pain, arthritis, migraines, Fibromyalgia, anxiety, depression, PTSD, ADD & ADHD, insomnia, appetite (and more)

Rating: 3.5/5 
This example of PGSC was on point. However, bud selection is an important review criterion for this site. The bud size in this sample was a bit disappointing. Almost all the buds were penny-sized “budlets”. 


NOTE: For details about this 1-5 Rating Scale, click here.



 
RPT SUMMARY:
Do you want to cross the line? ...Good luck. 

And remember, the next time you turn around, turn around again ...'cause I’ll be there.

-Officer Dick Downey, Badge #710
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Platinum Girl Scout Cookies: The Oath